Dumplings, Fireworks and Family

Spring Festival is one of the most significant holidays in China.

It is mostly about

food (dumplings),

Year of the Monkey

fireworks (noisy)

Year of the Monkey

and family (connected)

Family in Beijing

We are now (still) in the year of the Dog (year mostly auspicious for marriages) and are barking our way into the year of the Golden Pig (auspicious for having children, and great financial rewards).

Wild Bore Where Art Thou?
Year of the Bore (Pig) 18.2.2007 - 7.2.2008.

This festival is recorded in the lunar calendar which has been (sadly) failing us recently. It used to predict weather changes so precisely, like a prophecy recorded at the beginning of this ancient culture.

Looking back, there are some basic rituals that are still kept as part of tradition for most families.

Fireworks start rocking day and night even a week before the actual festival begings. This way bad spirits fearfully leave humans alone.

Children receive 'hong bao' (red envelope) with money inside. That way community provides support to all families so everybody gets to celebrate to their heart's delight. Hong bao is also given at weddings, birthdays etc.

Hong bao given at the ceremony of apprentice acceptance into the 6th generation of
Liu Xu Yang Sifu's Xing Yi Bagua School
(Year of the Dog)

Families are visited on appointed days - I usually get confused about the order and 'must'. Here is what it says on http://www.danwei.org/

The second day of the Chinese New Year is usually for visiting the family of the wife if a couple is married. A large feast is also typically held on the second day of the Chinese New Year. The seventh day of the Chinese New Year celebration is traditionally everyone's birthday, the day when everyone grows one year older. It is also the day when tossed fish salad, yusheng, is eaten. People get together to toss the colorful salad and make wishes for continued wealth and prosperity in the new year.

To read more about Spring Festival check the link Spring Festival Today

Thank you for Bamfield, keep watching the stars & be mindful

Recently, a friend's father passed away.

I sent her a card and observed stars with her

From another perspective.

A day has passed and as the sky switched its starry lights on where she was

She sent a message

Many thanks for the card and your thoughts.
I woke up 6.37 am this morning in the realisation that the veil between the visible and the invisible has gone, maybe for good and I don't think this is about just me. Be mindful.
Love peace and light.

To experience death of a parent is still unknown to me.

My mother says it is a peculiar feeling.

I resist to begin to imagine.

I choose peace instead.

I love them dearly.

February is so short...

February is for Resistance

I was, accidentally (or not), reading about the Release Technique and as the topic moved onto Resistance I realized my 6 Seconds callendar (based on EQ) was still on January (Self-Awareness). And as I flipped the page February revealed itself with its theme: Resistance.

This is what it says...

Be aware; resistance and its cohorts surface when anxiety is produced. Anxiety differs from fear in that anxiety deals with imagined or perceived dangers. So rather than employ resistance (or any of its synonyms) a better strategy is to consciously make a choice of limiting the stress. Then the negative effects can be minimized. Any of the following techniques are equally effective: meditation, deep breathing, napping, a sauna, escapes (reading, crafting), reframing, exercise, laughing. consider the above to be a cafeteria line. Select what works for you, your family, and community.

I am looking forward to February - Valentine's, Meilan's birthday, Dana's birthday, Martin's birthday, Ana's birthday, Chinese New Year: the Year of Golden Pig, skiing in Davos will inevitably bring healthy breathing and there it is - 28 days go by so quickly...

Imperturbability

imperturbability
noun

A stable, calm state of the emotions:

aplomb, balance, collectedness, composure, coolness, equanimity, imperturbableness, nonchalance, poise, sang-froid, self-possession, unflappability.

Slang cool.

See calm, feelings

Have you ever been in such a place where nothing and nobody can bother you?
The perfect place to be and it is not outside but within.

I just read (and remember, I am also learning): viscious circle starts with a problem and then...

We become insecure
We try to figure it out
WE want to know what to do
We want to know what the answer is
We try harder
We disapprove of ourselves
We beat ourselves up more
We still hold on to the problem

Beyond the circle I check this long word I have never heard of before: Imperturbability, space of calm emotions. No apathy, no grief, no fear, no lust, no anger, no pride - just courageousness, acceptance and peace.

Oh, I remember, I have been there once, just at this moment and, look, I become...

imperturbable

im·per·turb·a·ble

Run Dalida run + cue for a bit longer

For those who are born under the lucky star of 'visaless' travel my experience may not offer much except a glimpse of understanding what it takes to travel when holding less privileged booklet.

It was just last week that I thought I will try, first time in my life, to apply for American visa and attend a training held in Orlando. Once a year opportunity triggered will to go and try although, I have to admit, I have been in somewhat stage of helplessness even thinking about the possibility to travel to States.

As it goes with shattered beliefs, after receiving invitation letter from the organizer of the seminar, I learned that I had to do the following in order to apply for an interview:

1. Pay $100 at the bank for visa fee (non refundable)
2. Buy a phone card which allows me an excess to a number where I set an appointment (total 8 or 12 minutes available)
   
3. Call the embassy and set the appointment
4. Fill in the application forms
5. Provide 50x50mm photos (quite unusual format, I must say)
6. Write an employment letter, stamp it
7. Provide bank statement of my account

Now, many would agree that getting the appointment may take a long time - however, they said - come in two days, total surprise! Rushing and getting all the documents was just a minor added stress in comparison to expectations for the approval: will I get to go? I felt like a little girl waiting for parents to allow first-time-after-midnight-party-time.

I got the appointment for 9am. I was there 20 minutes earlier, I cued for 10. Once in the building I thought it was just the matter of time, however... I found out that I couldn't bring my mobile in, ok, I understand. What to do?

"Go to the building accross the street, purchase locker key, and leave it there"

I run.

I still have time, I get back and give my jacket for the scan.

"You have Ipod?"

Yes, I do.

"You can't bring Ipod in."

What do I do with it?

"Go to the building accross the street, purchase locker key, and leave it there"

OK, I have the key, I just need time....

I run.

I come back - still smiling gracefully and they let me in.

I cue... 20 minutes, hand documents in exchange for a light blue card. I joing the light blue group... I cue....30 minutes.

Fingerprints are taken, and they show us to the other section of the hall. We are not allowed to talk, at least not loudly.

I cue... 20 minutes

My interview time is here... 3 minutes. With a smile and a comment that he has never handled a Yugoslavian passport before visa officer informs me that I got a 3 year multiple entry visa.

I smile back, I turn and walk back home. I am still confused - I broke my helpless mode, got visa and after few runs, patient cues and printed fingertips the road has opened.

I am going to America.

An Inconvenient Truth

I have seen Al Gore's documentary about global warming. I felt like reading the manual how to use and maintain a newly purchased gadget only, this time, it was about the Earth. Many users, instructions not written in all the languages, not everybody is interested in maintaining it, not everybody is interested in claiming ownership ... where are we all going?

Sometimes I wonder if the Earth would give us the melting surprise of Ice Age even if we didn't invent cars, factories and various touches that make the atmosphere go "Urgh!" Either way, I do what I can to help next generation live its eternity and hope that 2012 is just another myth (like millenium bug). On the other side, if 2012 was the end of Earth as we know it (Mayan calendar states so), what would I do if I had another 5 years to live....

China Days

Good China days

• when clear skies open up the view and air is easy to breathe
• joyful taxi rides when drivers know where they are going, are quiet or sing and car is clean
• when I realise that systems have improved: new highways, less cues in banks, easy access to internet :D
• weekend hikes
• esoteric chats with friends
• clean restaurants and great service
• new discoveries about chinese ways of thinking which makes life so much easier

Bad China days

• polution beyond acceptable
• new taxi drivers whose cars smell and they can't stop talking about their assumptions of where I come from, who I am and what I think
• feeling trapped in Beijing traffic
• friends leaving China and feeling of loneliness
• MSG in food
• facing Chinese ways of dealing with reality that makes me assume Chinese people are ignorant and so not interested to work together on solving problems

Missing Links

Link after link after link.... I wonder how can I get from searching web about competencies into a pdf on psychic defense? Time clashes with lines and circles and the day is almost over. Do I full myself thinking that I have learned anything new? I downloaded all the fancy free stuff and put it away into the folders. Just in case - maybe some day I will find it useful. In meantime, Mozilla crashes and links disappear into the cyberspace.

www.businessballs.com
www.mindtools.com
www.geniuscatalyst.com

The Growth of Awareness

An old samurai warrior knew his time on earth was nearing an end and wished to bequeath his sword to the brightest of his three sons. He designed a test.

He asked a friend to hide just inside his barn, above the doorway, and gave him three small bags of rice. He then invited each son inside, one at a time.

The first son, after feeling the rice bag fall on his head, drew his sword and cut the bag in half before it hit the ground.

The second son halved the bag even before it hit his head.

The third son, sensing something amiss, declined to enter the barn - and so earned his father's sword.

Photos taken November 2005 in Tian Tan, Temple of Heaven, Beijing

Story taken from Body Mind Mastery (Creating Success In Sport and Life), Dan Millman

Choices

I've got 6 Seconds calendar for 2007 as a present. Hasty to know what was the artist's good wish for the next year I opened January: Self Awareness.

Recommended movie is Walk the Line - about Johnny Cash who follows the dream and lives the path of self-awareness that is not always bright and happy. Is the path to self awareness always filled with some dark, horror stories? Is there always that little (or big) surprise that shifts the paradigm and moves the behavioural mountains?

Stories are often told that major awareness shifts happen at times of dealing with grief or any difficult situation. Times of 'reaching the bottom', 'hitting the wall', 'holding a straw' are there not to tell us that journey is dangerous but to let us celebrate the learning.

I choose to be free.

There was a story on Internet - The one where Johnny lives in the moment. He chooses to be happy.

Recently I realised that Johny's choice was valuable for any evaluation of success and quality of life.

I choose to be free and happy.

Michael Neil talked about the scale of emotions in his newsletter. The last on the scale is peace. I totally agree.

I choose peace, freedom and happiness.

Images below (Celebrating moments):
1. Settling Mist, taken in Tibet, 2002 - on the way to Kailash. Thin air brought this image of peace and beauty.
2. Zmaj, taken by my sister Anita. The kite was bought in China, flown in the skies of Switzerland. I felt complete sense of freedom and peace when I saw this photo. I imagined my nephew Ivan learning how to 'work' the wind and succeeding to take it high into the clouds. Well done Ivan!
3. On the Top of the Hill - taken in the hills surrounding Beijing. One of K's and mine hikes that gave us amazing sense of freedom, peace and happiness.

Free to fly

Sometimes it just happens so that I feel like a bird - unaware that light is shining right under my feet.

The Difference In Perspective

Yesterday on a reality TV show host brought women of various nationalities and asked the audience to say what they think of them based on their appearance. Not long after the comments were shared heated discussion started. There were tears, most women felt insulted and how wouldn't they? Hispanic woman was labeled as The Maid, Iranian woman was perceived to be of use since she must have connections with Taliban (hence can help if terrorist attack), African-American woman was perceived poor... The women were bombarding each other with judgement, prejudice and conviction that the perception was justified since media was projecting it.

Being willingly brain washed is probably the laziest way of using the mind.

Wake up, travel, see different, experience different for you will think, feel and act differently and if there is anything you are not happy in your life with - it is time to change.

Happiness comes from harmony

Like a fortune cookie words stare at me stating:

Happiness comes from harmony, not wealth and fame.

Lao Zi

It further explains: In this saying, Lao Zi captures the Taoist attitude toward money and social status. while most people aspire to such goals, imagining them to be a source of happiness, the Taoist masters dismiss them as at best irrelevant and at worst an impediment to well-being.

Yang Zi teaches, "Four desires disturb our peace: The desires for a long life, fame, social prestige, and wealth. Those without these things are given no rest by their dissatisfaction and those with these things live in constant fear of losing them. It is the opposite with those who entrust their lives to destiny."

From the Taoist perspective, the majority of us spend most of our time valuing the wrong things, so it is no surprise that so few people are really happy. Lao Zi teaches, "the wise do not value a huge gemstone as much as a little time. Time is hard to find and easy to lose." If we fail to appreciate fully the gift of life, we are wasting our most precious resource and no amount of fame and gain will ever help us. Yen Zi comments, "If someone neglected his business to wander around aimlessly, people would say he was crazy. Yet those who completely ignore the inevitability of death and obsessively seek wealth and prestige are called sane!"

Happiness is our natural state when we are in harmony with Tao. When we allow our desires for wealth and status to disturb our innate contentedness, they become hindrances to happiness. True happiness lies in changing ourselves on the inside so that we come into harmony with Tao, not accumulating wealth and prestige in the world. Lao Zi explains, "The wise transform the inner to make the outer enjoyable, they don't try to transform the outer to make the inner enjoyable. They experience spontaneous enjoyment within themselves.

The photos above are the closest I got in visually expressing what I just read.

Dying for banana

Yesterday I conversed with my mind and when the question came up: "What is Death?"
It answered promptly: "A waste bin"
A grin and silence requested an explanation.
"It is like a banana peal - you throw it into a waste bin once you ate it. Dying is the peal - life is the act of eating banana. Once you are done you don't regret eating banana and you don't question the peal why you suddenly got it. It just is."

Invisible Ink

The pages are still blank, but there is a miraculous feeling of the words being there, written in invisible ink and clamoring to become visible. ~Vladimir Nabakov about writing

I was walking along the streets of Beijing when I saw a quiet group of people dipping their big brushes into icy water to write calligraphy on the pavement. Poems, quotes, words or even a simple character would briefly resist natural laws before they evaporate. Calligraphers, as it seems, remain inspired and fulfilled - otherwise they wouldn't be there every day.

Tribute to the signs near the travel-road

I have been thinking about different crossroads I have encountered in my daily decision making.
Abundance of choices, determined action and need to move forward. Sometimes I break through the walls, sometimes I ignore signs that say Stop! Often I look down when the sign is high up in the sky. There are no rules - each place will have own signature surprise. By the time I reach the destination signs make sense.




Look for Respect, Stop-Challenge-Choose, Ask for directions

This is the tribute to the signs near the travel-road

“Between the fear that something would happen and the hope that still it wouldn't, there is much more space than one thinks. On that narrow, hard, bare and dark space a lot of us spend their lives.”

Ivo Andric

Early morning epifany

I have been resisting early morning practice for two weeks. Sleeping in, enjoying warm bed, resting lazy bones - what a bliss! It is a mental block when none of the practice seems valuable and winter weather is way too cold to comprehend. At the same time I have to be honest: I know I 'd practice again but postponing the start seemed more valuable than dealing with frostbite.

Today was the day to break the spell. I hated every moment of the waking, I questioned my intentions, I rediculed the meaning of practice and was suspicious about Shifu's teachings. I went out anyway - as if I dared myself to check once again why I was so determined to practice in the past and possibly even hoping that I'll find reasons to completely stop practicing afterwards.

In silence I followed K who practiced all this time on her own. And there it was - full moon greeted us while night still resisted early morning call. It is 6AM, occasional joggers, early bus brings constructions workers to their site. I start practicing: I still hate it. I even forgot the most simple excercise. Simply not present. Step by step - after each sequence he double checks how I'm doing.

"I'm hating it", I say.
"Never mind, keep practicing" he says.

Epifany hit me while I was doing 'Dragon Moves Qi' excercise: I realized that I was doing something that was not common, not daily task, not something that everybody could do. Not at all. I felt priviliged to have exposure to secret knowledge, ancient Chinese culture and my humble place in it.

Today I learnt that my practice will not bring any advancement during winter. The only purpose to practice now is to maintain what I have created during Spring, Summer and Autumn. Not a great incentive, not the best combination, but I still decide to practice. It stills my mind and often that is the best part of it all - silence accompanied with the bright moon, like that time in Kailash while camping on 5200m and struggling for breath. Learning about the simplicity and power of the nature.

Unstructured day

Today is one of those days when meetings get cancelled and priorities shift so I get a chance to look at everything I have started once and not quite followed up on. Yesterday I worked on some photos, today is the day of writing and gentle reading, Monday I have coaching session, after that - I really don't know and I am loving it!

This was not an easy path of realisation. I have been resisting my nature for quite a while until signs were so obvious that I could only be blind if I continued doing what was not giving any results - trying to have one profession, work full time for corporate sector. By all means I don't mean that this is wrong thing to do - it was just not right for me!

Besides some obvious metrics and personality tests (Kolbe A Index, Strengths Finder Index, Enneagram), crucial person in my steady focus on what it is that fulfills me is my coach Michael Neill (www.geniuscatalyst.com). You can subscribe to his newsletter on the same website - inspiring.






In meantime - my blog became visible in China, we got a new puppy and I am learning new ways of happy thoughts. All is well.

Changes and tricks to view my blog

As I am trying to find the way to view my blog in China I set up another blog thinking that having China in my blog may be the cause of it being blocked. So, for those interested to hear more about my experiences and lifestyle in China please go to
http://life-coach-balanced-living.blogspot.com which I also cannot view here but I still decided to keep it as the main blog.
I am still learning how to use all the tricks of blogging.

Blogging in China - disciplined practice

I have started blogs somewhat suspicious and wanting to experience the new wave of communication when I realized that I can't view my blog in China. Enthusiasm waned out, idea of daily writing turned into weekly thought that I should write which inevetably leads to not writing... I am currently in Europe and just for fun of it checked how my blog looks like on the web - what a pleasant surprise. I saw one comment and that was enough to motivate me to write more.

This reminded me of the hurdles I passed with practice, not seeing the outcomes of doing standing stance or any other practice. I rebelled, thought that teachings were not real, that stories I heard about outcomes practice gives were fake. I read John's comment to my blog on finding shifu, and then I read his blog about the benefits of practicing alone. I can't agree more - getting to self discipline, self motivation and persistance is focal element of any practice. I also think that it is very important to have a healthy base of non-dependant relationship with a person that triggers that kind of approach to the practice, something I didn't add when I wrote about finding master.

Over and over again I learn how to observe self during practice, how to adjust body and intent while the nature does the rest. Whatever the journey and exploration of any practice is, if it is good for you keep doing it, five minutes a day is better than no practice at all. Evenutually you will find your own way by teaching others, passing the knowledge and learning even more.